My daughter is alive today because of these brave women

Throughout my life, I have had the immense honor of watching the women around me exhibit exceptional bravery. I first understood the true meaning of the word “brave” my senior year of college when I learned that my own birth mother was only 14 years old when she became unexpectedly pregnant with me, and with great courage and love, chose life and adoption.  

My understanding of the word only grew when, two months later, I began working at Real Options, a women’s health clinic in Allen, Texas, which helps women facing unplanned pregnancies. I had always held a deep passion for supporting women in need, but the thought of my own 14-year-old mother seeking help when she was pregnant with me, turned that passion into my profession.

Over time, I became the executive director of the center. As I helped the families in my community, I knew I wanted to start a family of my own.  

For years, my husband and I struggled with infertility, and I suffered from two painful and heartbreaking miscarriages, and then two failed adoptions. It became difficult going to work each day, knowing that I would be meeting with women who wanted to abort their child while I was mourning the loss of babies that I had so desperately wanted.

During my grief, I met with a woman who had a previous abortion and was now seeking guidance for another unexpected pregnancy. When I asked her about her abortion, she stated that it didn't bother her at all, but I could see the pain in her eyes. It was the same pain I was feeling.

When I told her that I too was grieving the loss of a child, she instantly broke down in tears. As we cried together, she realized that she no longer needed to be strong. For the first time, she was provided with a safe space to express her grief and regret. Quietly, she reached into her purse to pull out her baby’s sonogram image from the day of the abortion.

The bravery she exhibited when she acknowledged her pain and chose life for her second child gave me the strength to continue my mission of serving pregnant women in need — even if I was unable to be pregnant myself.

With my husband by my side, we continued to expand our programs and resources at Real Options to ensure that no matter their situation, women facing unexpected pregnancies had a place to come for help and support.

Today, our highly qualified staff of medical professionals works to offer exemplary medical care that includes pregnancy testing, ultrasounds, and abortion reversal prescriptions. We partner with nearly 150 agencies to provide legal help, childcare, job training, parenting classes, and so much more, while also working to meet the mental and emotional needs of the women we serve. The sex trafficking organizations and counselors that we work with, help to provide safety and security to women facing dangerous situations.

Additionally, we work with over 65 churches to offer hope and spiritual care. Our numerous men and family programs, led by my husband, empower men to be great fathers and active participants in the lives of their children.

Finally, while we hope that every woman will choose life for their child, we offer counseling and grief support for those who choose abortion. No matter her past or present, we want each woman to know she is loved and cared for.

Through these various programs, Real Options has served roughly 900 clients and saved more than 189 babies in the last year alone.

While my husband and I prayed for the health and safety of our clients, we continued to quietly pray for a little miracle of our own to bless our family — a prayer that was gloriously answered six years ago with a positive pregnancy test and the arrival of our beautiful Ava Jane.

I am raising my daughter to exhibit the same qualities the numerous women who have positively shaped me possess. I want her to be selfless, like the women who choose adoption. I want her to be full of love, like the incredible woman who raised me. I want her to be strong enough to say yes to the hard assignments like her I did. 

But most importantly, I want her to be brave, just like my birth mother was at 14 years old.

These qualities have lasting generational impacts. Ava Jane is here today because of her grandmother’s brave decision to choose life. Every year, thousands of women like my birth mom make the brave decision to seek help with an unplanned pregnancy at Real Options and in pregnancy centers across the country. We must do everything in our power to support them.