From 'Real Housewives' to Bible teacher: Lydia McLaughlin talks surrendering to God's calling on her life
Lydia McLaughlin, former star of the hit Bravo series “The Real Housewives of Orange County,” is reflecting on how God used her to further the Gospel during her time on the show and why she finally left, choosing to devote her time to encouraging women to find their joy and identity in Christ.
“God really used the whole experience [on “Real Housewives”] to give me a ministry, to give me a platform,” the 42-year-old speaker and author told The Christian Post. “And it's so cool looking back and seeing just His plan. But in the middle of it, I think, if I would have obviously disobeyed Him and stayed on the show, I would not be where I am today. And I feel like I'm just right in the fold of God's purpose for my life. And that's a really sweet place to be. I'm so grateful.”
McLaughlin, an outspoken Christian, wife and mother of three boys, joined "The Real Housewives of Orange County" in 2013 for season 8, left and then rejoined in season 12.
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She told CP that initially, she laughed off the idea of appearing on reality TV. However, after feeling called by God to "build a wall for my people” and being encouraged by her husband, Doug, she auditioned for the show and soon became convinced that it was her ministry and purpose.
Despite the excitement of the first season, McLaughlin felt a shift in her reasons for wanting to return for a second season. She found herself invited to Hollywood parties and enamored with fame and fortune and soon felt convicted to leave the show, but struggled with understanding why God would give her something only to take it away.
“I just felt really convicted that, no, God is calling me to leave,” she said. “And that was really, really hard for me because I didn't understand God. And I think a lot of people can relate to this: ‘Why would you give me something to take it away? This was never kind of something I wanted. And now all of a sudden, you're asking me to be obedient and give it up?’ It was like this real internal kind of conflict that I had.”
During a retreat, a woman prophesized over McLaughlin, telling her that she had a vision of her "returning to the palace." McLaughlin took this as a sign that she should not return to the show and left to focus on her family and other endeavors.
“I was just obedient. And I left the show. And it was a really hard decision. But it was the right decision,” she said.
After having a third child, the Newport Beach native ended up returning to "Real Housewives" for one more season, during which she said she was able to share the Gospel with others on the show: “I was able to use it as a ministry for one more year,” she said.
Now, several years removed from the franchise, McLaughlin is using her platform to encourage other women to find their identity, purpose and joy in Christ through her books and speaking engagements. She recently released a devotional, JoyFull: 365 Daily Devotions for Women, in which she reminds women that lasting contentment cannot be found in worldly things, but in Jesus alone.
“Whatever God's calling you into, just be obedient,” she said. “You don’t know how He’s going to use it. But if you feel it ... the Holy Spirit, and it confirms with God's Word that you're supposed to do it, you're supposed to do it. God can use anything, even a reality show. Now I'm writing devotionals and a Bible study. He can do more than we can even imagine. I love just surrendering to His will and being obedient. God can make your whole life just flourish.”
The speaker and author opened up about the struggles with social media and the negativity that can come with success. She shared how she was unprepared for the amount of judgment and criticism that she faced when she first joined the cast of "The Real Housewives of Orange County."
She recalled how even before speaking a word on the show, her announcement alone as the newest housewife garnered hundreds of comments picking her apart. The experience, she said, left her feeling vulnerable and exposed.
And as a Christian, McLaughlin also faced harsh criticism from members of her own community. She expressed how Christians can be especially harsh toward other Christians, citing the irony of those who preach love yet bash others on social media.
“I don't want to say it jaded me, but it made me sad,” she reflected. “I always kind of thought that at the core people are nice, but at the core, people are kind of harsh.”
Still, she reflected on the many lessons she learned during her time on “The Real Housewives,” including relying on the Holy Spirit for wisdom and surrounding herself with a praying community.
“You have to be obedient, but that's just not one day,” she said. “It's a constant kind of surrender to yourself, surrender to the Lord."
Following God’s calling, she said, is what sets one free, even when it’s uncomfortable and doesn’t make sense. In a society full of anxiety and stress, she encouraged others to find peace by investing in their faith and spending time in prayer and reading the Bible. Spiritual warfare is real, she said, challenging Christians to put on the armor of God to truly live a pure and righteous life.
“If we go into the battle prepared, we will win. And with Jesus by your side, we always win,” she assured.
“Instead of kind of buying into everything the world is telling us, we need to buy into what God's telling us," McLaughlin added, “But the only way we can do that is by being intentional. Set up habits in your life where you're actually fighting the fight and doing the work. … God wants to have a personal encounter with everyone. And His Word is how He talks to us most of the time. Our faith can increase by hearing the Word of God, and so we need to be in God's Word.”
JoyFull: 365 Daily Devotions for Women is now available.
Leah M. Klett is a reporter for The Christian Post. She can be reached at: [email protected]
